We are losing pastors in the U.S. at a rate of 1500-2000 every month. A 2015 Survey conducted by Expastor.com, which focused on pastoral health, explains some reasons why. Here are the highlights (actually low-lights) of their research:
- 81% of pastors at times feel unable to meet the demands of the role.
- 82% of pastors feel there are/were unrealistic demands or unwritten expectations of them and their families
- 47% of pastors constantly fight depression
- 63% of pastors consider themselves lonely
- 85% of pastors have considered leaving the ministry
I’m thankful for all the pastors who are not included in the stats above. They’ve either figured out how to stay healthy, or maybe just haven’t served long enough to experience much emotional trauma. In either case my hope and prayer for them is they’ll be intentional about staying healthy.
But my heart hurts this morning for those who are included in the stats above. So many great guys and gals are part of those numbers. Their hearts are full of love for Jesus and people. They’re skilled leaders. But the machinery of ministry has caught up to them.
Do the above stats bother you? If not… why not? If so… how should we respond? What can we do about it? Here’s three response we should avoid:
- The current generation of pastors simply must not be as committed to God as their forerunners.
- 21st century pastors are not as committed to the cause as their pastoral predecessors.
- Longevity and health for a pastor are hopeless and we simply must accept the statistics as inevitable.
None of the above are acceptable responses because they don’t reflect reality. The vast majority of pastors I meet with have genuine commitment to and love for the Lord. They are deeply invested in the lives of their flock. If longevity and health are reachable for some pastors, then they’re reachable for most pastors, if not all pastors. But not without a solid game plan.
Over the next few weeks I’ll be blogging about a practical strategy that increases the chances of a long and healthy leadership run. Today’s blog focuses on 3 emotional health baselines every leader has to know:
Baseline 1: You can’t give what you don’t have
If you have no money in your wallet or bank account, it’s difficult to give to those in need. If you have no fuel in your emotional tank, it is difficult to lead people or demonstrate compassion for them—not because you’re a bad person—but because you have nothing left to give! Pastors become statistics when they chronically run on emotional fumes. When leaders ignore the need to recharge their emotional batteries, they set themselves up to crash and burn.
Baseline 2: You are an emotional being
We’re not just body and spirit. We’re 3-part beings: body, spirit and soul. And the soul component of our lives includes our emotions. I’ve heard well-meaning Christians say: “If you take care of your spirit, you don’t need to be concerned about your emotions.” To which I respond: “So if I take care of my spirit, there is no need to pay attention to my body? I can eat whatever I want and be a couch potato with no negative effects on my health?” Pastor, you have an emotional component of your life that needs attention. It’s not your wife’s job to tend to your emotional health. Nor your children’s, your congregation’s, or your board’s. It’s yours alone. Yes, you need other people in your life to stay healthy—but don’t expect them to take primary responsibility for your emotional well-being.
Baseline 3: You have monitor to 3 key emotional indicators
I’ll give you a sneak-peek into these three indicators today, but tune in for next week’s blog when I unpack them in detail. Here are 3 emotional indicators every pastor who wants to get/stay healthy needs to monitor: Their pace (schedule)… their people (friendships)… and their plan (emotional maintenance strategy). These 3 key indicators help pastors (and everyone else for that matter) measure how much fuel is in the emotional tank. Ignoring them leads to trouble and shortened pastoral tenures.
Longevity and health for a pastor are doable. But they require understanding and proper behavior. Pastor or ministry leader, if you’re struggling, about to call it quits, and don’t know where to turn, you have to understand something: your life is not over. You can get healthy. But you won’t get there alone. Reach out for help. If you don’t have a trusted confidant, I’m here for you. I have weaknesses, but confidentiality isn’t one of them. Please contact me here and let’s start a conversation. Or click here for my latest book Unshakable You, 5 Choices of Emotionally Healthy People.
I’m praying and rooting for you!
Your observations are helpful. After 38 years of pastoral ministry, I have learned to cope fairly well with the stress of ministry but continue to be amazed at how callous and cruel some who claim to be Christian are. Typically a small number of members of most churches who are not engaged in helping with the church’s ministries and have no clue about the nature and mission of the church are the ones who criticize the pastor. These folks seem to worship the gods of tradition and personal preference. They don’t understand that the church belongs to God alone. I pray daily for those who are new in ministry. The amount of ignorance and apathy concerning the very difficult work of pastors and the sacrifices they and their families make is appalling as is the lack of respect from many church members. I’m glad to know the church of Jesus Christ will endure but there are many unhealthy congregations and toxic persons who make life miserable for faithful pastors and do great harm to the cause of Christ.