How we forgive is a harbinger of leadership fruitfulness and longevity. In part 2 of Leadership & Forgiveness, we focus on extending forgiveness to ourselves, and four powerful forgiveness principles we need to know. The better we get at forgiving, the healthier we get, and the better we lead.

Extending Forgiveness to Yourself

• When I cause God pain by sinning, it is wrong to take vengeance on myself.
• T. Kendal: “If we feel guilty, blame ourselves, and find we cannot function normally—even though we have confessed our sins to God—it indicates we haven’t yet totally forgiven ourselves.”
• The blood of Jesus washes away our sin as though it had never existed.
• God is more interested in our direction than He is our perfection.

Forgiveness Principles

• Forgiveness doesn’t equal trust

Forgiving the person who injured you does not mean trust is, or even should be, re–established.

• Forgiveness doesn’t equal reconciliation

While reconciliation may not always be possible or wise—extending forgiveness is always possible. Forgiveness takes one person. Reconciliation takes two.

• Forgiving doesn’t mean forgetting

After the healing of forgiveness comes, we still remember the injury occurred, but the painful emotions connected to the event do not overwhelm us anymore.

• Forgiveness doesn’t mean compromising our self-respect
• Biblical forgiveness does not discount your feelings, nor require you to pretend they don’t exist.

Matthew 18:21-34 tells the story of the man who was forgiven a debt of millions, only to turn around and put someone in prison who owed him approximately two dollars. Both guys ended up in jail. When we refuse to forgive, we are held hostage to the wounds of our past . . . that is the bad news.

Here is the good news:

Forgiveness releases you and me to fully experience God’s ability to take the painful events of our past and turn them into something beautiful, fruitful and life giving.