PURSUING UNCOMMITTED PEOPLE . . . AND WHY YOU SHOULDN’T
One of the biggest mistakes I made as a young lead pastor was spending too much time trying to get uncommitted people to be committed. I would do breakfasts, lunches, and coffees trying to convince the unfaithful fringe to become faithful. And in doing so, I largely...
4 SECRETS TO BEATING DISCOURAGEMENT
Discouragement is universal to leadership. Every leader, no matter how seasoned or successful, faces moments of despair. “Can I get through this challenge?” “When is this tough stretch going to be over?” “Am I the right guy/gal for the job?” These kinds of questions...
5 MUST-ASK QUESTIONS WHEN CONSIDERING A TRANSITION
“John, I can’t take the pressure anymore . . . I’m thinking about resigning.” You’d be surprised how often those words or some variation of them travel across the cellular airwaves to me each month. Lead pastors who feel desperate, tired, emotionally beat up, out of...
HOW TO BE PASSIONATE ABOUT YOUR CALLING WITHOUT BEING DRIVEN
What drives you? Passion? Or adrenaline? Passion is an intense desire or enthusiasm for something. Adrenaline is a hormone secreted by the adrenal glands, especially in conditions of stress, increasing rates of blood circulation, breathing, and preparing muscles for...
WHY PASTORS RESIST REST
I am fed up. According to an extensive Barna research study of 14,000 U.S. lead pastors, published in January 2017, 37% of lead pastors are at medium to high risk of burnout. A whopping 66% say they have no deep friendships. 40% are not energized by ministry work....
3 REASONS GREAT LEADERS NEVER STOP LEARNING
Are you teachable? Really? It’s critical for a leader to answer this question honestly, because the level of our teachability determines our level of lead-ability. When you’re experiencing momentum in ministry or business, it’s easy to start believing you are the...
4 THINGS TO DO WHEN YOUR CALLING GETS TOUGH
“God I’m doing everything you’ve called me to do—why are things so hard right now?” Ever thought that? Told God that? I have. And I know I'm not alone. The other day I had breakfast with a friend who has an amazing calling on his life. God is using him and his wife in...
6 WAYS TO NAVIGATE DIFFICULT CONVERSATIONS
If you want to lead well for a long time—you have to figure out how to handle difficult conversations. In last week’s post, Leadership & Difficult People we stated that longevity in ministry requires pastors to occasionally make tough people-decisions, and from...
LEADERSHIP & DIFFICULT PEOPLE
Difficult people go to church. I wish it wasn't true . . . but sadly, it is. Not all people who go to church are difficult. The vast majority are not. But the few who are can make life miserable for a leader. I graduated from Oral Roberts University a starry-eyed...
THE POWER OF “NO”
Do you ever struggle saying with “no”? In his 2014 book—The Power of No—James Altucher writes: “How many times have you had to say ‘no’ only to have it cause anguish, arguments, and anxiety? Even the hours, days, and months before you say no you are filled with...
3 WAYS TO STAY FOCUSED ON YOUR ASSIGNMENT
Assignment is such a critical word for a leader. 2 Chronicles 23:6 says “… all the other men are to guard what the Lord has assigned to them.” The apostle Paul said at the end of His life: “I’ve finished my race.” One of the biggest challenges a leader wrestles with...
3 WARNINGS EVERY LEADER SHOULD HEED ABOUT WORK-WEEK LENGTH
What is the ideal work-week length? In 1900, the Ford Motor Company commissioned a series of tests to determine how long a workweek should be to optimize productivity. Ford discovered the “sweet spot” was forty hours per week. Sara Robinson, in her article Bring Back...
ONE OF THE BIGGEST CHALLENGES FACING EVERY LEADER (AND WHAT TO DO ABOUT IT)
“Healthy leaders know how to separate what they do from who they are.” ~ Carey Nieuwhof That one-liner hit me right between the eyes earlier this week. Been going through a challenging stretch of late where it’s been a struggle to separate those two things. I’m...
3 IDEAS TO NAVIGATE DIFFICULT CONVERSATIONS
Have you ever been in a meeting where people were talking (and maybe even shouting), but no one was communicating? I recently sat through one of those . . . it was ninety minutes of sheer torture. Multiple people talking over each other, not listening to each other,...
2 MUST-DO BEHAVIORS THAT HELP US BUILD FRIENDSHIPS
Every relationship in our life—both present and future—carries with it a degree of risk. If risk-free friendships you seek, find yourself more and more isolated you will. (Written in Yoda-speak) In our increasingly lonely society, I wonder if one way we try to...
3 SMART WAYS TO RUN THE RACE GOD HAS CALLED YOU TO
I despise long distance running. In high school, I was forced to run track because playing football (my real sports love) was contingent on running track. No track, no football. I was a sprinter by body type, but for some reason our track coach thought having me run...
THE THREE MOST IMPORTANT THINGS I LEARNED IN 2018
Wow—another year is in the books. I know it’s cliché-ish, but every year seems to go faster than its predecessor. I blinked, and 2018 was over. 2018 was an amazing year in so many ways: I have an incredible wife who is beautiful on the inside as well as the outside....
CHRISTMAS & THE SEASONS OF LIFE
Christmas was magical to me as a kid. The fresh-cut pine tree loaded with lights and ornaments; piles of snow outside; Charlie Brown and The Grinch Christmas specials; holiday kielbasa and raspberry cream pies; family gatherings; opening gifts; no school for two...
3 ROADBLOCKS TO FULFILLING RELATIONSHIPS
We live in a world that is more connected technologically than any time in history. But I wonder if our technology prowess has resulted in us being lonelier than any time in history? In the Garden of Eden, shortly after creating Adam from the dust of the earth, God...
6 REASONS TO GIVE THANKS THIS YEAR
Tomorrow is Thanksgiving Day! I’ve heard business and psychology gurus pitch the idea that we can think our way to a better life. Their premise? Our brain is soft-wired, and can be re-wired by thinking positively, and in doing so, we can have a happier life. Since...
3 SUBTLE DANGERS OF WORKAHOLISM
I enjoy watching the ABC show, Shark Tank. It’s entertaining, funny, informative, and at times—touching. The show reminds me about the importance of focus, passion, hard work, and commitment to one’s calling. It’s a weekly testament to the power of diligence,...
4 QUESTIONS EVERY LEADER NEEDS TO ANSWER FOR THEIR TEAM
One of the more important challenges a leader will ever solve is: How can I get more out of my team without crushing them? Unmercifully squeezing as much as possible out of team members until they burn out is not good leadership. Neither is manipulating or coercing...
FIVE THINGS I LEARNED AS A SUICIDAL PASTOR
In 1992, I was the lead pastor of a growing church. We were having a banner year. Highest attendance ever. More people committing their lives to Christ than any year prior in our tenure. Record financial giving. We were in a wonderful stretch of organizational...
3 SIMPLE SECRETS THAT WILL KEEP YOU IN THE RACE
I love what I do for a living. Coming alongside leaders and helping them lead better, lead longer, and enjoy it more is deeply fulfilling. Some days I pinch myself to make sure I’m not dreaming. Getting to do what you love every day is a gift from God. But that...
4 SIGNS YOU MIGHT BE A PEOPLE-PLEASER
I want everyone to like me. But I don’t need everyone to like me. I’ve been wrestling with the above thought for weeks. I want everyone to like me. But I don’t need everyone to like me. Wanting everyone to like me, when issuing from a healthy place, speaks to...
3 TENSIONS WE NEED TO MANAGE TO GROW TRUST & DIMINISH WORRY
No amount of money will ease all of your anxieties if you leave trusting God out of the equation. Jesus said worry chokes the life out of what He’s planted in us. And elsewhere He commanded us: “Do not worry, saying ‘what shall we eat/drink/wear?’ For the pagans run...
6 WAYS TO HEAL YOUR BROKEN HEART
“Lord, I’m hurting this morning.” Ever prayed that prayer before, or some version of it? I’m not talking about physical pain here—rather, about emotional pain. Especially the variety that issues from disappointing relationships. You know, the kind of pain that feels...
3 THINGS TO DO WHEN YOU FEEL STUCK
Over the weekend, Laura and I helped some dear friends move into their new house. I was freshly reminded of the stress moving into a new home places on people: the boxes, the planning, the long hours painting and cleaning, and the overall disruption it inflicts on...
4 WAYS TO FREE YOURSELF FROM THE PRISON OF PERFECTIONISM
I am a recovering perfectionist. It was circa 1997. I was in a pre-service prayer room, getting ready to speak to a group of about one hundred teenagers. I was pleading with God for twenty agonizing minutes to help me, use me; praying like I was trying to wrench...
4 WAYS TO OVERCOME SCHEDULE ARRHYTHMIA
I have several friends who suffer with Arterial Fibrillation or A-fib. With A-fib, the heart's upper chambers (atria) beat out of coordination with the lower chambers (ventricles). Another word used to describe A-fib is arrythmia. Arrhythmia is a problem with the rate...