If you want to lead well for a long time—you have to figure out how to handle difficult conversations. In last week’s post, Leadership & Difficult People we stated that longevity in ministry requires pastors to occasionally make tough people-decisions, and from…
Difficult people go to church. I wish it wasn’t true . . . but sadly, it is. Not all people who go to church are difficult. The vast majority are not. But the few who are can make life miserable…
Have you ever been in a meeting where people were talking (and maybe even shouting), but no one was communicating? I recently sat through one of those . . . it was ninety minutes of sheer torture. Multiple people talking over each…
In 1992, I was the lead pastor of a growing church. We were having a banner year. Highest attendance ever. More people committing their lives to Christ than any year prior in our tenure. Record financial giving. We were in…
“Lord, I’m hurting this morning.” Ever prayed that prayer before, or some version of it? I’m not talking about physical pain here—rather, about emotional pain. Especially the variety that issues from disappointing relationships. You know, the kind of pain that…
Do you struggle with the F-word? The last two weeks we’ve been looking at the subject of getting a grip on our anger and learning how to express it in a healthier way. You can’t talk about anger very long without…
We live in an angry world. The age of outrage. In last week’s blog, 5 Things Everyone Needs to Know About Anger, we considered five basics we have to understand: Anger is part of the human experience Anger often involves…
One of the hardest things to do in life is to forgive a person who has deeply wounded you. When a somebody attacks us, forgiveness is not usually the first thing on our mind. For some of us, our initial…
I have exciting news to share with you—our newest book—Putting the Good in Goodbye: A Healthy Conversation About the Comings & Goings of Church People—is due out in January 2018! I coauthored the book with my friend and colleague Jim…
“John, I can’t take the pressure anymore. . . I’m thinking about resigning.” You’d be surprised how often those words or some variation of them travel across the cellular airwaves to me each month. Lead pastors who feel desperate, tired, emotionally…
