3 Tanks Every Leader Needs to Fill – Part 2
Several years ago I drove an awesome red truck. The day I brought it home from the dealership, my wife’s first response was: “Oh, that’s a cute truck!” Not exactly the response I was looking for. Manly—yes. Awesome—certainly. Cute? Never! The truck had an RPM gauge...
3 Tanks Every Leader Needs to Fill – Part 1
“If I pay attention to the spiritual part of my life, the rest will be taken care of. Why would I need to focus any time or energy on my emotions?” This puzzling comment was directed to me after teaching a session on refueling emotionally. My response to this leader:...
Six Things I Learned on Vacation
Back in the 70’s, Cheech & Chong put together a shtick entitled: Sister Mary Elephant. The good sister was substitute teaching for Sister Rosetta Stone, and the class’s assignment that particular day… report on their summer vacation. The first young man (in a...
Leaders & EIQ
Do you work with a person who is an intellectual giant and an emotional runt all rolled into one? 20 years in the business world have taught me many lessons… one is IQ doesn’t guarantee emotional IQ (EIQ). Intellectual brilliance doesn’t ensure emotional smarts....
Taking a Flyer
Orville and Wilbur Wright, two American brothers, inventors, and aviation pioneers, are credited with inventing and building the world's first successful airplane. Skeptics were plentiful as the brothers pursued their dream of manned flight. But they didn’t allow...
Four Need-to-Knows About Forgiveness
In last week’s blog—Swallowing the Bitter Pill—I admitted my occasional struggle with bitterness. We explored the negative impact of grudge-holding on our spiritual, emotional, and physical well-being. I introduced several forgiveness thought-starters for us to...
Swallowing the Bitter Pill
In 1989 Don Henley released a hit single entitled: The Heart of the Matter. Some insightful lyrics in this song are: "There are people in your life who've come and gone They let you down and hurt your pride Better put it all behind you; life goes on You keep carryin'...
When Your Plans Blow Up
Hello my name is John… and I'm a plan-aholic. I'm addicted to routine. The weekly checklist is my friend. Each day of the week, my tasks are laid out. It feels great to draw a line through an item when it’s complete. A good day to me is crossing everything off the...
5 Behaviors of a Secure Leader
Many leaders struggle with the demon of insecurity. (I’m using the word “demon” metaphorically, not literally.) King Saul was the crown prince of this particular character flaw. Chosen by God to be Israel’s first king, Saul had good looks, leadership skills, flashes...
7 Behaviors of Highly Missional People
Are you missional? Missional is a popular word in church circles today. It’s also a hotly debated word. Ed Stetzer writes: “Any discussion of missional cannot be complete without asking the question, ‘which missional?’” For me, a missional person is consistently on...
Christmas & The Seasons of Life
Christmas was magical to me as a young boy. The fresh-cut pine tree loaded with lights and ornaments; piles of snow outside; the Charlie Brown Christmas special; holiday kielbasa and raspberry cream pies; family gatherings; opening gifts; no school for two weeks… for...
Get a Grip… on Fear
We live in a crazy world. If you watch the news, you’re bombarded with disturbing images and stories. Most news programs don’t lead with stories about the positive things in life. Human nature defaults to focusing on what's wrong in life. As a result, our world is...
A Thanksgiving Tradition
The Opalewski family has a tradition every year at Thanksgiving breakfast: we go around the table, and each person shares what they’re thankful for this past year. (I know… not too original.) I look forward to this tradition every year, because there are always some...
3 Things Every Leader Should Know
Wouldn’t it be great if all a leader needed to know was 3 things? Wouldn’t their lives be simpler? The truth is, a leader needs to know more than 3 things—one reason more books on leadership exist than we’ll ever be able to read in our lifetime. I’ve lost count of the...
Pastoral Health: A Myth?
Being a pastor has its great points. Being a pastor has its not-so-great points. Some people have a naïve view of pastors. They’re convinced since he or she is doing the Lord’s work, a pastor’s life is a charmed life… exempt from normal human pressures, and the wear...
The Green-Eyed Monster
It’s time to kill the monster. Jealousy… aka the green-eyed monster… threatens us all. It's an emotion everyone deals with occasionally. Its roots are insecurity, fear, self-doubt, or anxiety. Jealousy often emerges when someone achieves something you’ve wanted to...
What to Do When You Feel Lost
Lost was a popular American television drama series that originally aired on ABC from September 22, 2004, to May 23, 2010. During its sixth and final season, the show averaged over 11 million U.S. viewers per episode. I never watched Lost… but there have been...
Everybody Cheats
News broke this week that 11 million Volkswagen vehicles worldwide were fitted with the software designed to trick emissions testing equipment. A few months ago during the summer, NFL fans were inundated with Deflate-gate—a controversy over the illegal deflation of...
The Temptation of Isolation
This past weekend Laura and I served a church in the Upper Peninsula of Michigan. For those of you who are not Michiganders, our state’s Upper and Lower Peninsulas are connected by the 5-mile long Mackinac Bridge. If you don’t like bridges, you really wouldn’t like...
Rejection Stinks
Daniel Grant, in his article: A Problem All Artists Face: Dealing with Rejection, states: “Nothing irks artists more than criticism and rejection. Probably every artist has experienced rejection of some quantity...” Grant points out Vincent Van Gogh sold only one...
Beauty & the Beast
Do you like to check things off your list? Yesterday I stared at the third-quarter goals plastered on my whiteboard… almost two months into the quarter, and not one of them was crossed off. The whiteboard stood there, mocking me. Of my seven Q3 goals, five are in...
The Power of No – Part 2
In last week’s blog – The Power of No Part 1 – we introduced the idea of saying no as a brave thing to say. We considered three filters we can run our “no” through: Mission, mindfulness, and methodical-ness. We learned the power of no can keep us centered and sane. In...
The Power of No – Part 1
In his 2014 book—The Power of No—James Altucher writes: “No is an incredibly painful, brave word to say. How many times have you had to say no only to have it cause anguish, arguments, and anxiety? Even the hours, days, and months before you say no you are filled with...
Can God Move in Your Life?
Today we welcome a fresh voice to the Converge Coaching blog... Mary Selzer. Mary is a wife, mother, coach, and a good friend. Hope you enjoy her contribution ~ John A few years ago I prayed and asked for a “move of God” in my life. As soon as the words left my lips,...
Getting Comfortable Being Uncomfortable
This week our church is involved in a mission’s trip. Not overseas—but right here in Sterling Heights and its surrounding cities. We’re serving multiple communities in a variety of creative and practical ways. Laura and I signed up to help at a block party. Our...
3 Things to Do When You’re Stuck
This past weekend I experienced a first… Downtown Detroit’s Eastern Market. A mind-boggling array of flowers, shrubs, fruit, vegetables, fish, baked goods—sprawling over multiple street blocks. So much to look at… so much to choose from… it was overwhelming, but fun...
3 Steps to Handling Tense Conversations
Have you ever been in a meeting where people were talking (and maybe even shouting), but no one was communicating? I recently sat through one of those. 90 minutes of sheer torture. Multiple people talking over each other, not listening to each other, and trying to...
Three Ways to Stop Hurrying
Rachel Macy Stafford, a New York Times bestselling author, relays the following personal story about hurry. “My thoughts and actions were controlled by electronic notifications, ring tones, and jam-packed agendas. And although every fiber of my inner drill sergeant...
Trusting God: 3 Behaviors to Get You There
In 1986 Billy Joel wrote a hit single entitled – It’s a Matter of Trust. Here’s one of the lyrics: “Some love is just a lie of the heart. The cold remains of what began with a passionate start. But that can't happen to us. Because it's always been a matter of trust.”...
Do Winners Ever Quit?
When one of my boys was 12 years old he announced that he was “retiring” from soccer. His 2-year AYSO career was officially over. He was hanging up the soccer cleats for good. Maybe you've heard the axiom “Winners never quit and quitters never win.” But I wonder… is...